Books: reading on my travels – Lie with Me by Philippe Besson

By Laura McCarthy

I take a plane to Bergerac in July, the temperature already reaching 26 degrees by our 10am arrival in France. Once past the airport and business parks on the outskirts, the town itself appears to me as a well-preserved pressed flower between the pages of a book.

Bergerac wears her history on her sleeve.

Half-timbered, shuttered buildings line the cobbled streets, so ancient that they seem to lean, threatening to topple over – exhausted, but not in a miserable way, more like a beloved grandparent after a full day caring for the grandchildren.

On the plane over here, I had started to read Lie with Me by Philippe Besson, translated from the original French by Molly Ringwald. 

I am a strong advocate for what I call “mood reading”, in which you read books that set the tone for your experiences.

In summer, for example, I might read about the mice of Redwall during their Summer of the Late Rose. In autumn, the dark, Gothic atmospheres in Dracula or Frankenstein may appeal.

Before my visit to France, I wanted to find a book set in France, written by a French author, even better if I could find something in the same area I’d be visiting. 

A good portion of Lie with Me takes place in 1984, in the rural French town of Barbezieux. This little commune is not so far from Bergerac, nor the other two places I planned to visit, Saint Emilion and Bordeaux. Perfect. In fact, in the second half of the novel, we begin in the city of Bordeaux.

Lie with Me is an autobiographical novel, in which Besson remembers his first love, Thomas Andrieu. Due to the stigma of the time, Thomas needs their affair to remain a secret. Their romance unfolds in unseen moments, hidden in equipment sheds at school or in Philippe’s bedroom when his parents are away. Besson captures his teenage frustration, longing, and love for Andrieu in moving detail, blending his current, wiser, reflective perspective with that of his younger self.

There is a tragic sense that this cannot last, however, as Andrieu seems fated to stay in the rural community whilst Besson is destined to become a writer, travelling the world. Thomas appears resigned to the fact that he will not make his escape from the closet, the farm, or Barbezieux. It is inevitable. 

Many years pass before Besson hears anything of Andrieu again. We are in Bordeaux at this point of the narrative. Having walked the city myself, I am enthralled by the details he shares of a Bordeaux pre-UNESCO. I see a picture perfect collage of Gothic, Neo-classical, and Modernist buildings, all cleaned and maintained to radiance (in a UNESCO site, you get fined if you do not keep properties to such a standard!). Meanwhile, Besson references the barbed wire and grime of an earlier time, in the city as he first knew it, before highlighting the contrast after 2007. This is the joy of choosing a book which compliments your travels. You see a fuller, more fleshed-out version of the world – something you might not have seen yourself.

In Bordeaux, a chance happening with Thomas’ son leads to the events which occur in the latter half of the novel. What transpires is enough to bring tears. It is heartbreaking and powerful, and reflects the tragedy of running from your true nature. I am crying, wracking sobs, by the final page.

Despite my tears, or maybe because of them, I recommend Lie with Me. It is a short novella that you could get through in an evening if you wanted to. More than this, it is a snapshot of Southwestern France, of youthful yearning, and the contrasting experiences of gay men. And, if you’re going to France any time soon, it is a must read.